This post will be like a continuation of what @khaleesii discussed in her post about whether your career can prevent you from finding love.
In her concluding part, she said
There are other variables except for career that could be at play in preventing your quest of finding love and while a career could be important, you will also need to examine the others.
The others are what I want to discus in this post so if you can read her postulation about the effect of your career on your chances of finding love, you should be able to get the idea behind this post.
Finding love
Finding love in this context is not about your primary school love or your secondary school affairs which all ended in premium tears 😂😂😂.
It is about finding a life partner with whom you can build an empire with. It might look somehow but you as a being contribute to you own calamity of not finding love.
What can prevent you from finding love?
Your past experience
You might not agree with this but truth be told, your experience with other gender at the early stage of your life has a psychological effect on your chances of finding love.
At the early stage of my life, I chopped breakfast pass anything and it got to the stage that I already made up my mind that getting married is not compulsory 😂😂😂. Having baby mama will not be a bad thing.
After few years of staying single, I met another lady but the fear of break up did not make me to even say a word until the lady got engaged right before my eyes. Maybe we are not meant for each other. Maybe that's why I could not talk to her about my feeling. All these might be true but one basic fact is that my past experience hold me back from expressing my feelings.
Your personality
This is more common among guys than ladies. Most people don't care about what people think about them.
Yeah, you don't need to care about what other people have to say but at least pay attention to your personality. Your personality starts from your dressing.
You can be on dread and still look good but there is a limit to what you can wear and where you can wear it.
Someone told me one day,
It is true that you will be addressed the way you dress but also dress according to your address.
He is trying to tell me that, dress based on where you are going.
How can you be going for a date and dress as if you are going for a board meeting? 🤔🤔🤔
Aside from your dressing, your routine is part of your personality. If you are so engrossed with your phone, you will find it difficult to express yourself when you are with other people.
Your personality include your behaviour, your mode of expressing yourself, your attitude to work and your attitude to others.
All these are little things that matters.
Cultural beliefs and norms
Before you roast me, let me say my mind first. I know this might cause a lot of confusion or bring about a lot of reaction and counter action but to certain extent, there is a role that cultural beliefs and norms play in your search for love.
In my own cultural belief, it is believed that only a man has the right to woo a lady. It has been like that and it will be forever but as a lady, why can't you express your feelings as well.
Also, some guys will look down on any lady that expresses their feeling and think of them as nothing but a whore. Who told you that you cannot find love the other way round. Must you be the one that must profess your love first?
This belief alone has sent many love to early grave because the cultural belief make it a taboo.
Another aspect of cultural belief is the age when you must get married.
While in school, a lady told me that I should have someone I am serious with because I was in 400 level then.
LMAO, 🤣🤣🤣
Who told you I cannot have a serious relationship from my 100 level?
She went further and said, if a lady did not have any serious relationship in her 400 Level, she is going to get married late. Like are you for real?
These are not just thoughts but she is upholding our cultural beliefs and norms.
Our culture has set a standard and age limit for us and all of us are working towards it whether consciously or unconsciously.
To the best of my knowledge, these are other variables that might prevent you from finding your love but the factors are not limited to these. So if you have anything to add or remove, you can make further suggestions by making a comprehensive post or engage via the comment section.
Till I cross your path again, I am like a ready made pen in the hand of the creator. I am
A²¹