She woke up with a start, she had had the dream again, the dream where she and Alex kissed and almost always ended up in bed. Alex was a family friend, he was with her throughout her stay at the hospital, he ran errands and kept her company during the unfortunate ordeal except for the few months he traveled out of the country for work
The accident would have cost her her life if not for divine intervention. However, it did affect some parts of her brain as she hit her head on the ground after the car she was driving lost control and somersaulted.
She has told her therapist about the recurrent dreams, but he assured her that it's normal, it could just be the brain's way of recollecting lost memories. That left her further confused, she was never in a relationship with Alex, so why should he be appearing as her lover in her dreams? The roles different characters play in the dream cannot be logically explained sometimes, the dreamland is funny that way.
The incident has been over a year now, and she has since resumed work. She had to take an extended leave from work to recuperate fully. Alex was with her and never left her side, and the one time he did, she met Samad. Alex is an engineer and works at the other end of town, but that doesn't stop him from always showing up for her. They grew up together as kids, only he was a few years older than her.
Sitting on her bed to reminisce, she remembers when she used to have a huge, childish crush on him. Thankfully, she was over it, though she still found him irresistible. I mean which woman wouldn't crush on Alex? He was dark-skinned, handsome, had solid 8 packs, and had a dimple that turned women to jelly when he smiled. She had since given up hope of anything romantic happening between the two of them, he saw her as a younger sister.
Many thoughts swim around in her head and she finally settles on one, Samad. She smiles at the recollection of his name, picks up her phone from the bedside mirror, and dials his number after checking the time, it is past 5 a.m.
The phone rings at the other end and he picks up in his rich, clear baritone voice, "Hey babe, what's wrong?"
"Nothing much, I couldn't sleep, so I thought I should holler at you".
"Are you sure you are good though? Why couldn't you sleep?"
"No big deal, I had a silly dream".
"Okay, don't you have to go to work in the morning?"
"I do".
"I have work to do at the office in the morning too. I need to get some shut-eye. It's going to be a long day".
"Go to bed then, hearing your voice is reassuring enough".
"I'll talk to you later in the day. Take care of yourself now, babe".
"I will and I love you".
"Love you too, babe".
Tessy ended the call and stared at the phone in her hand, if there was one thing she had never really liked about Samad, it was his abrupt end to conversations. He was her boyfriend, but he could be hard to figure out sometimes. He wasn't the type that liked the public display of affection, he was the cut-the-crap, straight-to-the-point kind. He had a routine that he followed strictly, and even the slightest deviation could irritate him. The kind of deviation she made with the call just now.
She met him a few months after her accident, he was cool and all, but he wasn't her type, he was just too formal and stiff. She knew it was too early to date after the incident, but she was at the lowest point in her life, battling with an inferiority complex and thinking she no longer looked good. She had brain surgery after the accident, and for someone to whom looks mattered greatly, she saw the scars as a deformity. She has since learned to regard it as her battle scars, the scars she got from fighting death and triumphing. Besides, Alex was out of the country then, she was lonely and Samad came into the picture.
Samad was just comfortable to have around, she had gotten used to having him around though not physically most times, but as a claim to having a boyfriend. He was like an outdated toy one no longer had use for but couldn't bear to discard.
Alex, Alex was a different topic entirely, all she had to do was call and he would come running. She debated whether to call him, but decided against it. He could be very dramatic, it's just a dream, not a nightmare. Besides, she didn't want to take advantage of his generosity all the time".
She laid back down on her bed and continued to reminisce staring at the ceiling until she drifted off to sleep.
****************
"How would you feel about getting married next month?" Samad asks Tessy casually, her head on his lap in his living room where they are both watching TV.
She raises her head in surprise, "Next month? Are you joking?" She picks up the remote and mutes the TV volume.
"You know me, I would never joke with something like this. So, what do you say?"
She stares at him incredulously, "Is this your idea of a proposal? No ring, no bent knee, no romantic words or something. You just ask me casually like it's a daily routine".
"Stop overreacting. We have been dating for almost a year, you have a good job as a TV presenter, and I'm a successful artist too, so what else is there? We don't need any fanfare to get married and be done with it. What relevance will romantic words have? Stop acting like a child, we are both adults here"
"This was not how I intended my proposal to look like, I can't even post a picture to announce it, because, where's the ring?"
"Come on, Tessy, we are both adults. We are way past all that. Fix a date with your family members within the week so my family can come for the introduction. Kindly let me know before the week runs out".
She sighs, "Can you just give me time to think about it though?"
"You do that, but please ensure it's snappy. I want everything finalized as soon as possible". He picks up the TV remote she earlier dropped on the chair and unmutes it to continue watching the TV, leaving her staring in puzzlement at him.
*****************
"Hi, Alex, when can I come to see you? Should I come to your house? I can be on my way now". Tessy asks Alex over the phone.
He responds hastily, "No, don't come, I'm out of the house.
"You know, Alex, you have been acting strange since my accident. Every time I ask if you are at home, you tell me you are not. What's going on? Do you have a live-in girlfriend?"
"Stop it, Tessy, there's nothing wrong and I don't have a live-in girlfriend. Even if I did, it's not enough reason to stop you from coming to my house, I've just been real busy".
"If you say so. How about you meet me at our regular spot for lunch in the next few minutes?"
"I'll be right there".
****************
"So, he said I should give him feedback this week. It's funny, isn't it? Who proposes to a woman like that?" Tessy asks over the table in the restaurant where she's having lunch with Alex.
"Well, what's your decision?"
"I haven't decided anything yet, it's still strange to me. What do you think I should do?"
"I'm not in the best position to tell you that. It's a decision you have to make for yourself, and whatever it is, I'll support you. You are a queen and you deserve the best".
"Thank you, Alex. I know you have my back always. You are the sweetest man I know".
"And you are the most beautiful woman I've ever met, you are smart, gorgeous, out....." She leans across the table and cuts him off with an unexpected kiss. He kisses her back and draws her closer.
They end the kiss and an uncomfortable silence settles between them.
Tessy picks up her bag and runs out of the restaurant, her face flushed with embarrassment.
Alex bangs his fist on the table angrily, earning curious looks from other customers. He curses inwardly and blames himself, "What came over you, Alex? You swore to not lose control around this girl......"
***************
Tessy has just closed up from work and is about to enter her car when she sees Samad parked in the lot. He signals to her, and she walks over to meet him. She enters his car and sits.
"I'm surprised to see you, did you call me already? I was in the studio, haven't even checked my phone all day".
"No, I haven't called you. It's been three days since I proposed to you, and I haven't gotten any feedback, I wanted to ask if you have made a decision, there's no time to waste".
"I haven't. I'm still thinking about it". How could she explain to him that she hasn't decided because Alex has suddenly taken over her entire brain? He's all she thinks of these days, and she can't even function properly. "I will have an answer for you tomorrow, I need to put something to rest today".
"Okay, that's cool. I drove down from work, I have a commissioned painting I ought to deliver by the weekend, I have to go and finish it".
"Alright then", She steps out of his car and walks down to hers, talking to herself on the way. "There's no chemistry between us, I'm not sure I want to spend the rest of my life trapped in a loveless marriage, my kids don't deserve that. I need to talk to Alex".
She enters the car, starts up the ignition after putting the car in reverse, makes a reverse to face the car in the right direction before putting it to drive, and exits the lot cleanly like only a professional would do.
****************
Alex walks to the door to check who's at the door upon hearing his doorbell sound, "Who's there?" He asks from within.
"It's me, Tessy, I want to talk to you".
"Te, Tes, Tessy?" He stammers in panic.
"Yes, it's me, open the door".
"Okay, I'm coming".
With the speed of lightning, he hurriedly removes the picture frames hanging on the wall, on top of the shelf, and on the center table. He quickly runs and packs them inside. He assesses the living room to make sure it's devoid of any pictures before opening the door for her.
"What's the matter, Tessy? You look so troubled".
She enters and takes in the sight of his apartment, "I just knew you would figure out something was wrong, I've never been able to get anything past you". She takes in the sight do his living room, "It's been quite some time since I stepped in here".
Nodding nervously, "Yeah, it is". He motions to the couch, "Have your seat".
She sits and he sits down next to her.
"Samad came to see me today, he wanted to know what my decision is".
"And have you made a decision?"
"Not yet. Please, get me a glass of water".
"Forgive my manners, I was more concerned about the worry written all over your face. I'll be right back". He stands up and leaves for the kitchen.
Tessy stands to assess the living room when her eyes catch the sight of a photo album, under the center table. She takes her seat and starts looking through.
The first few pictures feature her with Alex during their childhood, teenage, and adult years. She smiles and continues flipping until she sees some that leave her confused. She saw herself seated in a cozy position with Alex on several occasions.
"I don't even remember where we took these pictures", she says, smiling to herself.
Moving on, she comes across a particular one in which Alex is on his knees, the wall behind him decorated with the words, "Will you marry me?" Shocker! She's the one pictured accepting the ring. She shakes her head as if not wanting to believe what's before her eyes, and continues to flip quickly, seeing different pictures of her locking lips with Alex, the two of them at the beach with her on his back, and lots more.
The memories come rushing and slamming at her at once, she drops the album on the floor in panic, her hands shivering from shock. The dream of her kissing Alex was not a dream after all, it was a revelation. She was not only like a sister to Alex, they were engaged to be married.
She knew something was always nagging her whenever she was with him, she just couldn't figure it out.
Alex enters, carrying a tray with a cup of very clean water balanced in the middle of it. He sees her shaking and his eyes take in the opened photo album on the floor.
The tray falls from his hand, and the cup shatters on the floor. He runs to meet her and holds her shoulders.
"I'm so sorry, Tessy, I didn't want you to find out this way".
Tears rolled down her cheeks, "What other cruel way did you intend for me to find out? Alex, we were engaged to be married the month after the accident occurred. I woke up in a coma, saw you there with my family, and you didn't deem it fit to tell me anything throughout".
"It's not like that, I swear".
Shouting, "How is it like then? And to think we shared many beautiful moments, we were even planning our honeymoon in Dubai. We discussed having two kids, a boy and a girl, we agreed on the kind of wedding we wanted, and we picked out your suit and my wedding gown together. Hell, we even scouted for the interior decorator together, how dare you do this to me?"
"Will you at least listen to my side of the story? It's not been easy for me as well. It took all my self-restraint to not tell you. I was dying inside just seeing you with Samad, I wanted to tell you, but I just couldn't".
"And why is that, you heartless man?"
He swallows and clears his throat, "After the accident, you were in a coma for days, and I never left your bedside. The doctor who operated on you told us that depending on the severity of your condition, you might not remember anyone or something anymore. He said we had to take it easy on you and hope for the best, let you recover at your own pace".
"What has that got to do with anything? I recovered very well, and you could have told me after if I ever meant anything to you".
"Please, Tessy, just listen to me. You mean more than you would ever know to me. You are the very air that I breathe, and I've been shattered since you started going out with Samad. There was nothing I could have done".
"That's your excuse huh? Samad? Seems like you were looking for an opportunity to break things off, and Samad was a convenient alternative".
He grabs hold of her two shoulders and shakes them, "Don't you understand? I traveled soon after you got discharged from the hospital, and you know it. I was out of the country for three months, and I couldn't tell you before I left, I wanted you to be back at full strength before I told you. The most painful part was that you remembered everyone except me. What else could I have done?"
"You should have told me soon as you got back".
"You were already dating Samad and I felt you were happy, I didn't want to ruin things for you. Moreover, I can't hold you hostage to the feelings you had for me that had become absent. Even if I had told you, it wouldn't change anything. You didn't remember me, how would you remember the good times we shared?"
"That wasn't your decision to make, it was mine and you robbed me of it. I would have ditched Samad in a heartbeat if you had told me. I just wanted to use him to fill a certain void I couldn't explain. It still didn't work because he was not you.
"I wanted to sincerely, I just didn't know how. I didn't want to ruin another man's relationship".
"How come no one ever told me this?"
"I begged them not to, I didn't want you to overthink things too much with the head injury you just survived. I love you so much, I can't ever stand to see you unhappy. I did what I thought was best".
"Was that why you never wanted me to come to your house?"
"Partly, the living room is decorated with pictures of us, I couldn't take it down cause I loved every single one of them and I wouldn't trust myself around you".
"What if I married Samad?"
"I'll slump and die. I didn't want you to marry him, I also didn't want my selfishness to get in the way of a happy marriage you might have. I was just praying for a miracle to happen somehow to separate you both".
"That's rubbish. I couldn't find any pictures on any of my social media accounts, was that you too?"
"I was with you the last time you changed it, and you showed it to me in case you ever forgot. I logged on and deleted everything, there were too many pictures of us both on there. I'm sorry. I will do anything to make it up to you".
Sniffing, "I remember giving you. I don't love Samad, he's not you".
"I don't like him too, he's not me. What do you say I propose to you again?"
"I don't know, Alex. You deceived me for too long".
She gently pushes him away, picks up her bag, and exits. He runs out after, calling out to her to her parked car.
***************
"By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride".
The priest announced the holy solemnization of Tessy and Alex.
The latest couple lock lips and kiss.
"What do you say we make more memories for that photo album so our children can have a history to refer to?" Alex asks, whispering in Tessy's ear.
She giggles and nods... "I completely agree, I'm game".
