As I leave this world, I look over at the faces of my children, who huddle around my bed.
Mark, who married a wonderful partner and had three beautiful children. Sandra, who excelled to become one of the top heart surgeons in the state. Ian... he just marches to the tune of his own drum, that is a source of pride in itself.
I die knowing the three of them will be fine, the last gift from life as I depart. A bright light overcomes the lines that define their faces, the incessant beeping of machines drowned out...
I feel myself floating away, my old bones don't ache anymore. I am five again, and my mother has baked a cake! Her perfectly curled hair does not wilt in the heat of the kitchen, she is a resplendent goddess who the word grace was invented for; the wellspring which patience flows from.
I'm a pre-teen, and my heart is broken. Jane is there, at the cusp of all the trouble we will make together. She offers me her hand; I offer her my heart. Two sisters in spirit, we know we will walk this earth together. Skipping class to pace museums, conversation flows as we learn that life is about the plays you make. We endeavor to invent our own rules.
Highschool comes along to find us at the roller rink each Friday night, while our peers share angsty dates, we skate. Dancing swiftly past it all. Until Jane meets Bradley, becoming distant as love flourishes. One Friday I find myself alone on my skates, when I spy something that makes my blood boil, momentum carries me to intervene.
Another soul sister met, her name is Marsha. The girls at the roller rink bully her, so I bully them. We skate off into the next chapter of our lives together, and soon Jane comes back to join us.
College, what a time that was! Jane and Bradley stayed together, agreeing to marry after graduation. Marsha does not date, although she is certainly coveted. The awkward girl she once was is gone, in womanhood she has bloomed like an orchid. I am still just me, and that is okay. When Jane buries her face in Bradley's chest, I bury mine in a book.
We say we will spend just as much time together after university, but of course we don't. Marsha fell in love senior year, and soon is married and expecting. Bradley stalls, and I see Jane most frequently when she is fuming about that. I don't mind, that's what friends are for. I'm happy when she calls, and understand when she doesn't.
Now that my degree is complete, I search for a teaching position, my resume loopy on dense cream paper. Striding along tiled hallways until I solidify my place in a classroom, I marvel at the interactions of children I see. So much meaning in ones so young, as they develop their identities in the tsunami of puberty.
At Seneca Highschool I begin my career teaching science, unaware that it would be brief. I don't see Jane or Marsha much, we are all busy, and making plans is unreasonably difficult. We take turns missing each other's phone calls, the universe rarely lining up a hangout.
Time began to snowball, as it does, many years going by in the blink of an eye. The joy of cultivating young minds, to be a rung in the ladder of personal growth... helping young people through hurdles filled me with purpose. I loved my job, but six years into my career I ran face first into a dilemma.
Love entered my life with the smile of a man named Glen, who I married within months. He was patient and kind, creative and resourceful. However, even in our bliss, the year I gave birth to Mark was one of the hardest of my life. To leave my newborn in daycare hurt terribly, and Glen couldn't bear to see it.
I fought the idea of leaving my job at first, feeling bitter that I wasn't balancing things better. Glen wouldn't hear a lick of that, and we decided I would leave temporarily. At least, that is what we thought at the time.
Staying home was truly dreamy, both Jane and Marsha came around all the time again, yet it never lost that nostalgic feeling. As the children played, we recounted old stories, and detailed the development of new ones. As Christmas drew near, I learned I was pregnant again!
With Sandra swaddled in my arms, days seemed to go by twice as fast. Yet, something was still missing. One day, I met an angel. Her deep copper skin positively glowed in the sunlight, amplifying her bright, even smile. Naomi was always smiling, "Joy is rebellion" she told me once.
Naomi runs a program for disadvantaged youth, and in my free time I rekindle my passions volunteering. Now, the agony I felt in my heart for those children melts away. Replaced with shining faces, I watch once again as they escape the cycles that tie them down. I cherish the time I was able to spend with each of them.
My mind floats to Ian, born drug addicted, and so terrifyingly small. I remember the first time he gripped my finger with his tiny hand, he was my son from then on. Through adoption, we welcomed our third child home, bringing new light to our family.
The pace of time in my twenties is laughable when I think how fast my thirties went. Then forty came along to show them both up! Before I know it, Mark is married. Sandra in medical school, while Ian... What mattered was he was doing well, happy. All of my children had found a path that fulfilled them.
Babies come so quick when you aren't carrying them! Soon, Mark floods my home with the gorgeous mischief of children each week. My grandchildren terrorize my house, and it's wonderful! I watch Mark wrap an arm around his wife, as the kids prance about in the grass, serenity.
The rest is really a blur. Glen and I grew old together, but he never stopped being devilishly handsome, even when the cancer came. He worked until retirement in a chemical plant, where one of the agents compromised his health. He died the year I turned eighty-three, but I'm not sure he left. I felt him in the home we built, as I watched our children thrive.
I am eighty-seven when my health crumbles. It happens fast, and I don't mind. Surrounded by the love of my family, I know true peace as I drift off from the hospital room. A warm feeling like summer sunshine kisses my face tenderly.
I open my eyes again; except I am not in the chartreuse hospital room, laying in a scratchy gown anymore. I stretch my arms out, marveling at the smooth skin I suddenly have, when I spot it. Above me, dozens of horses... with wings. They weave in and out of the clouds mesmerizingly.
Reaching up to meet them is the clearest rainbow I have even seen; I trace it down to the ground, finding it's end close by. So, this is what you find at the end of the rainbow! I walk over to it nervously. Mustering the courage to touch the light, I find my hand cannot pass through it! Testing this, I lean my weight against it slowly. It feels totally solid!
Looking down, I cannot make out any of the flowers in the meadow anymore. Above me, the clouds close in, a few more steps and I would pass into them. I consider walking right back down the rainbow... but I know that is not my way
His voice comes out of nowhere, "Welcome to Valhalla!" I'd have a heart attack if I weren't already dead! He towers over me, a rope-like beard swinging at his waistline, which is parallel to my shoulders. He grins widely, a gentle giant.
I sound twenty again as I say, "You must be mistaken dear, I've never been in so much as a scuffle!" a chuckle escapes my lips. "Besides, I'm Christian!" and now I really laugh, my odd new friend joins in. His beard slaps against his bare stomach with each giggle, sending a ripple through his tattoos.
The strangely childlike laughter he shares with me dies down, and he looks into my eyes meaningfully, "You're one of the greatest warriors to enter these halls, you fought many admirable battles. You brought glory to your clan!" the wide grin sends stars into his blue eyes once more. He holds his hand out to me, and we travel into this strange afterlife.
He continues as we walk towards a large fort, the breeze that sways the grass carries intoxicating scents with it, "You fought to be decent from day one. Standing up for those who needed an ally..." he pauses to take in the night sky.
I hadn't noticed the sun setting as we walked, now as night comes alive I stand in awe of the bounty over me. A tapestry of a million stars spreads out, comets streak by with vibrant trails, hundreds of other worlds sparkling like precious gems among it all.
He motions for us to continue, as the merry crackle of lively conversation from beyond comes into earshot, I smile. I hear the swing of string instruments merging into piano, the roar of a ballad complimenting the tune.
"This is but the doorway you were assigned," his voice is softer now, "You will see those of your faith again once you pass through our gate..." he trails off. "Unless you'd like to stay?" he tilts his head, before laugher shakes his wide torso again.
We grasp hands as we chuckle together, walking on. Of course I would not stay, but now I was honored to have been invited.
This is my submission for the Ink Well's 89th prompt, which was to create a vivid story setting around "light". I hope you enjoyed my take, which was inspired by a cherished friend 💚